My mom came over and talked with me. I told her I needed her.
I unloaded everything I wanted to unload to my therapist:
- I want to quit my Master's program
- My house is in disarray
- I do not want to celebrate Halloween - I feel empty
- I don't know if I want to live anymore.
She held me. I cried. She made me do yard work. I cried. She gave me advice. I cried. But somehow, after all of it was out in the open. I felt a huge relief. She encouraged me to keep going with my Master's degree, to find things to keep my mind occupied, and to keep living.
So, the big news is that I am continuing my Master's degree. Although I feel like I have ADHD with my anxiety and cognitive issues, I am still powering through these VERY hard classes. I just need to find things to keep my mind occupied. If my mind is occupied, my thoughts will not wonder to any negative areas.
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