Okay, this post is just going to describe the nightmares I have when I get just a tiny bit of sleep. No one really likes reading about other people's dreams so, you don't have to read it if you don't want to. Warning, I didn't sleep more than an hour last night, so I hope this entry makes sense:
Last night:
I dreamed that after a bad "friend date" at a restaurant, in which my friend ditched me, I walk out to my car. I greet my sister there. Then a ton of people start running past us. I grab her by the arm and start running too. I hide her behind a car and put my body over hers covering her. I look up. I see a white male, in a red jacket, with a long rifle. I think "Not again." I tell her to go under the car to hide and I will be the lookout for her. I hear gun shots. I wake up.
Another Dream:
It's weird. I had a very similar dream last week. It was night time. My sister and I was out walking. People start running and hiding in houses. I knew there was a shooter out. I heard gun shots. I find a parked car in a lot. I tell her to get down, and stay quiet. I shield her as she slides under the car and the foot steps of the shooter get closer and closer.
Sometime this week:
I had a dream that I was out in public with friends. I start getting anxious so I look for my medication bottle. I open it to dump a pill in my hand. Two dead flies come out instead. I wonder how they got in there and I determined they were in there for a long time (since college). Then, one of them comes back to life. Then the next. Then there were more in the bottle. All coming to life and swarming around me.
Another dream with Erich:
I think a common dream I have is where I am doing something mundane, like shopping. I remember a dream where my husband and I are in a Target shopping for things. Then from the back room gun fire starts. Every one drops to the floor or runs away. Erich has vanished. I cannot call out to him because there are multiple shooters in the store. I start crawling around, looking for him, knowing each move makes me a target. This type of dream is the second most common.
Pregnancy:
Everyone around me is pregnant so I won't go into detail on who this dream was about. Basically someone in my life who is pregnant was over my house. I was cooing at her belly and rubbing it. Then all of a sudden she goes into labor. A dead, grotesque looking baby falls out. The pregnant girl starts wailing, screaming, crying. The imagery is awful. Dreams like this, where the images are twisted and grotesque happen all the time.
Getting shot in the head:
I dream I get shot in the head a lot. One that I remember most vividly is I am walking in my grandmother's neighborhood. I hear gun shots. I duck us between two parked cars. The gun man, a black older male, sees us. I am shielding my grandmother and I put my hand in front of my face. He shoots me in the head. This type of dream is the most common.
End of the world
Another type of dream I have is when it's the end of the world or the Apocalypse. It's usually in the form of an unstoppable force. One dream I had recently is a giant asteroid, as big as a planet, is crashing into Earth. There is no stopping it. My whole dream is panicking, chaos in the streets, and then the eventual death of every living thing and the destruction of the planet.
In conclusion, these nightmares most likely contribute to why I am not sleeping. Why go to sleep when something awful happens, my life is at risk, or I die? I am begging for sleep though. It has gotten to the point where I am scared to drive. Driving makes me want to fall asleep behind the wheel. I need to remember to tell this to my psychiatrist tomorrow. I hope I remember to and do not downplay it.
No comments:
Post a Comment